Let me start by saying a big thank you to Titi and Suzan for their comments. I am really happy the last message has been a blessing to you.
Last time we started talking about Unequal Yoking. I will like to continue from where I stopped.
Imagine you have two people who want to carry a long table and one of them is a six footer, while the other is a three footer. You can imagine what the two parties will go through carrying the table because they are not of the same height.
The truth of the matter is that you might never find two people of same height but then there’s a need to get someone who is within the same range. To say I am looking for someone just like me with same family background, tribe, church, school, experiences blah blah blah will not just be realistic. Nevertheless, there must be some equality especially spiritually. What Bible says is “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers”. God expects the core of our being to come from our spirituality. As Christians, our whole life should revolve around our relationship with God. I don’t know if you are like me but nothing works around me when I am not in tune with God. And from experience I know that in marriage you will do yourself a lot of good by marrying someone you share core spiritual beliefs with.
You can appear to be unequally yoked with a fellow believer, not because of the difference in your denominations but in your beliefs. Take for example one party believes in speaking in tongues and the other does not, one believes you should guard your heart with all diligence and that affects music, movies and all, while the other party does not think so. I could go on and on.
For a single reading this article, I think this is a time for you to identify your core values as they will help you in choosing your spouse. Identify what you can live with and what you cannot.
Many Christians take for granted the fact that a person’s background can have serious influence on the life of such person and your marriage. Please don’t get me wrong, I know we do not have the opportunity to choose our background (that is our family) and it should not be held against a person, nevertheless, I believe you should have an idea of what you are going in for and choose to accept or reject it.
Take for example the story of Dipo who is in a Christan relationship with Kenny who has promiscuous sisters. Kenny is a good girl alright but she doesn’t have good influence from her family members and these people are not people Dipo can yank out of her life. Dipo will have to go ahead bearing the fact that he will have to deal with this people directly or indirectly, at the same time Kenny can convince Dipo that her family will not influence their marriage in any way.
Many Christians have missed this fact. Remember Abraham told his servant to go back to his father’s house to go and look for a wife for his son. He took this so seriously that he asked that his servant swear to him.
May be you are married and reading this and somehow you realize you and your spouse seem to be unequally yoked in many ways, all hope is not lost. While going through marriage counseling before marriage, we shared a prayer “Lord help me to accept the things I cannot change and also gracefully change the things I can”. Always pray about those things that really bother you about your spouse and be very patient. Cover up your spouse deficiencies and be strong.
Here is the bottom line, you will never find two people of same spirituality, values, background etc but then similarities must out number differences especially Spiritual similarities.
God bless you as you seek to do His will beyond yours!
Love,
– omolola ezeifeoma
