Marriage from the Scriptures III
TEXT: I Peter 3: 7
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
I Peter 3:7 KJV
“Likewise in the same way, HUSBANDS dwell with your wives with knowledge…..” what knowledge?
Knowledge means familiarity with someone or something, this includes facts, information, descriptions, or skills acquired through experience or education. The scripture is saying study your wife, get to know her and deal with her based on this knowledge. So, the next time she behaves in a particular way you do not like, remember that it is in her to behave in that manner, so you do not see it as an offence targeted at you.
“Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established:
And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.
A wise man is strong; yea, a man of knowledge increaseth strength.” Proverbs 24:3-5
Spend time trying to know your wife. This line reminds me of a film I strongly recommend,Fireproof. And not just know your wife; know what God is saying concerning her too. The next verses that follow explore further…
Giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel ….
Appreciate that she is a weaker vessel. She is not like you, she is strong in her own department but not in yours. She needs to be pampered. She cannot carry the family burden like you can. Women have tried to prove a point of being just as strong but truly they are not. God has created each person uniquely to fulfil a certain purpose. Have you ever seen a man trying to simultaneously carry four bags and a woman doing the same? Or have you seen a woman trying to drive a nail through wood and a man doing the same? God has created each one uniquely for His pleasure. The fact that both male and female are created for His pleasure drives home the next point.
As being heirs together of the grace of life
You are both heirs called of God; she is under your authority but she belongs to God first. Ask God what He would want for her and be sure to support and ensure His will is done in her life just as in yours. Give her your full support. Sometime ago while meditating, I heard in my spirit, that God calls his daughters home (that is, to eternity) sometimes because of this reason. Culture has taught men to keep their wives in subjection and Christian men have brought this idea into marriage thereby hindering the expression of the fullness of God in the lives of their wives. God is a God of order. He is not saying a woman should be disobedient to the man, rather, He is asking men to live, in awareness that they represent Him in the lives of their wives and must remember that in Christ there is no male or female. Don’t get carried away plotting your success plan, forgetting your wife is also a light that must shine. Provide full support for her also to fulfil God’s purpose in her life through your marriage.
That your prayers be not hindered.
Every man who does the Word as required gets express answer to his prayers. The answers to your prayers are tied to knowing your wife, treating her honourably and acknowledging the fact that she is God’s vessel in your care! When you do these things, you open up the heavens for yourself and your home. I have seen this Word work in the life of a few couples I know and the results are astounding!
Please keep studying the Word and share lessons learnt as comments. I look forward to hearing from you!
Online Resources
http://www.keepbelieving.com/sermon/2005-02-13-Unhindered-Prayers/
http://bible.org/seriespage/obligations-christian-husbands-their-wives-1-peter-37
http://www.onechristianministry.com/christian-articles-563.html
God Bless and keep you!
Much Love!
-Omolola
Marriage from the Scriptures II
Before we go into this study, I want to put in form of a disclaimer saying, ‘The words I share are not mine’. In fact in the course of this study, I have had to review my own personal stance on some issues. So, just in case you are out there saying, ‘Practice what you preach’ or asking, Can she do that? Remember that it’s God’s instruction and His Word He will honour (Isa 55:11).
TEXT: I Peter 3: 1-6
The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty.
Questions
The writer says here: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs.
What do you think is your spouse’s need?
The needs in the lives of people are different, so it is important to forget how you feel and objectively answer this question. Don’t try to compare your husband with the next man because he is unique.
Please ask yourself the question:
What does my husband need from me?
Do I have what it takes to deliver? What do I need to get in terms of virtue to attain?
You might find out after asking yourself the question about your husband’s need that you lack what is required to deliver, this is why I asked this question. This is the exact situation I found myself. Oh he needs me to be this so he feels like this but how can I? How can I be like this without pretending it not me! Very correct! What is requested of us is not living the life we choose but tapping into the grace of living the life of Christ (Gal. 2:20-21, Isa 53:7).
I have found out that sometimes we have spent too much time dwelling on the shortcomings of our spouses that we become those things without knowing. An example is a woman married to an impatient man who has now become impatient with her husband’s tendencies and snaps back at the slightest provocation. Fire for fire will always lead to wild uncontrolled fire.
This scripture further explains that every husband must be honoured, even those who are not in faith or acting as required. Now this is difficult, how do I do this?
Sister I wish I had all the answers but I don’t, yet I know someone who does: God; and He speaks to us through the Holy Spirit. When we spend time in prayer, submit our will, we will find a way out.
It is interesting how much women go through in terms of appearance to please their husband. Some people may not agree with me on this, but if we spent that much effort on our inside we will yield more result. I have found out that no matter how much a woman goes out of her way to remain pleasing in the sight of her husband, his being faithful is dependent on his commitment to God rather than to his wife. Remember Joseph, How can I do this against God! -was his motivation.
What matters most is not only your outer appearance–the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes– but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in.
Am I saying you don’t look good, NO! But much more than look GOOD, BE GOOD! Let your style come from inside out showing first the glory of God!
“The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as ‘my dear husband.’ You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.” I Peter 3: 1-6 MSG
“But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” I Peter 3: 4 KJV
God is interested in our living a life of the Spirit! This life is a life that is actually beyond the flesh and we cannot attain being so entangled with things! We need to get to that place where our beauty and calm countenance is a product of the abundance of what we enjoy on our inside. I have met very few women with this grace in my lifetime. My prayer is to become one too! To exude the fragrance of a quiet spirit!
Sarah our example was a very beautiful woman, yet she was not applauded for it but for her spirit, I can imagine my husband telling me to pretend as his sister. (Gen. 20:1-end). My fictional requirement of a husband will cry out, are you not supposed to be my Knight in the shining armour? Why do I need to protect you now?
But my mama Sarah knew better, she saw herself as one who could shield her husband too! Women have always done it in history, Remember Zipporah! She went ahead of Moses to do the needful. (Exo. 4:24-26). Abigail also went ahead of Nabal to secure her husband’s life and hers. (I Sam. 25:3-42).
WORD FOR THE SINGLES
Do you respect your fiancé or boyfriend? Do you think you can bow to his authority? Do you see virtues in him now that you will forever respect?
Highly Recommended Resources:
http://www.todayschristianwoman.com
http://www.crosswalk.com/devotionals/encouragement/
Please keep studying the Word and share lessons learnt as comments. I look forward to hearing from you!
God Bless and keep you!
Much Love!
-Omolola
Marriage from the Scriptures I
God wants to transform Christian marriages. He wants to take us to the next level and I believe this is the reason why He is releasing word like never before so that we are equipped with the Sword of the Spirit to take us to the next level in our marriages.
I want us to take the next few weeks on this page to study Scriptures together, so I will really appreciate your contributions to this study. Your insight, criticism, disagreements are all welcome as comments and I believe at the end of the study, we will have better marriages and everyone who come in contact with our footprints on this page will bless us for it.
TEXT: I Peter 3: 1-6
“The same goes for you wives: Be good wives to your husbands, responsive to their needs. There are husbands who, indifferent as they are to any words about God, will be captivated by your life of holy beauty.
What matters is not your outer appearance–the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes– but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands. Sarah, for instance, taking care of Abraham, would address him as “my dear husband.” You’ll be true daughters of Sarah if you do the same, unanxious and unintimidated.” I Peter 3: 1-6 MSG
“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.” I Peter 3: 1-6 KJV
We will start with the admonitions to the women. Interestingly, I found from this scripture that the woman is being given more instructions than the man; most probably because the writer – our father in faith, Peter – realized that the woman has a very peculiar position in marriage. She is not the one who has the final say, as she is to submit to her husband’s will. This is not a very easy position to find yourself but then we have been GRACED to be submissive.
I hear someone ask, ‘Submit even if he is making a wrong decision? How do I submit to the kind of man I have married?’
By going back again to this scripture, the passage acknowledges the fact that your husband will not always be on your side in faith or other situations of life but the way to justify yourself is by actions that are meek not characterized by pride.
“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;” (verse 1)
God wants us to use our actions to speak volumes, more than our words. This is very difficult! I know and I am a living witness; still going through the process.
Even the best of our actions are sometimes misconceived as pride therefore; it is of great essence to build our inner man to be sensitive enough to know when and how to speak.
Only a totally broken spirit can be submissive as recommended by the scripture. This is why the scripture admonishes us to build the inner man. Become that person that receives her source from God Himself.
Blessed, Broken and Given!
I recommend Cece Winans’ song, Blessed, Broken and Given to everyone reading this piece. It explains the process God uses to build our inner man. God is still using the limited resource to feed thousands with left overs by Blessing, Breaking and Giving!
That inner man was Blessed of God when we gave our lives to Christ, Broken when we let go of our ways and say to the Master, ‘Let your will be done’, and Given after we have learnt the lessons from the process of being broken and now we are giving life to the people God has put in our lives.
We become a source of life to our husbands, children, in-laws, family, colleagues and everyone we come in contact with.
We are able to get here only by giving ourselves to activities that build our spirits and person. Reading the Bible, Good Christian Books (Not Just Christian Love Stories), being a part of Bible Practical Study groups, taking time out to soak up the word, evaluating our lives under the lamp of God’s Word.
I recommend II Peter1:1-9. It gives a breakdown of the life expected of us.
The greatest challenge for the Christian woman today is that she is too encumbered with getting through her daily activities and she has limited time to build herself. She is also often distracted by the need to catch up with vogue! The vanity of who we are is revealed by running a check on what we spend our money on. A quick question, when last did you go to the book shop to find books or audio materials that are intended to build your spirit man?
We spend more time in the salon, more money on human hair, shoes, and bags than the things that build us up! We suffer from the worldliness that has infiltrated the church. The average woman bends down today in church and the brother needs to take cover, she sits down and he is wondering where next to look, because she has not build her Spirit man to know that not all fashion is for her. I am sorry if I sound so hard but we need to talk to ourselves.
We women have fallen victim of the fashion created by the world because we fail to walk circumspectly always asking ourselves, is this for me? Should I be found doing this? All these take us back to the basics: Build your inner man. We need to go back and learn from Sarah, Hannah, Abigail, Zipporah, Dorcas, Lydia, Deborah and so on, who are our real mothers in the faith!
God helping me, we will X-ray the lives of some great women next time.
Some Great Resources
http://www.todayschristianwoman.com
http://www.crosswalk.com/devotionals/encouragement/
God bless and keep you!
Much Love!
Omolola Ezeifeoma
