Demas Was Here
“Demas loves the things of this world so much that he left me and went to Thessalonica.” 2 Timothy 4:10.
Not much was said of the man, Demas. But he was obviously a colleague of Apostle Paul for a period of time. But the brief remark Paul made of him is not to be emulated. Let’s try to paint the whole picture in just one likely possibility.
Let’s assume Demas was an ambitious young man who had always desired to serve in the Roman army. He was on the path to being recruited when he witnessed Paul’s teaching about Jesus and healing the sick in one of the gentile communities. He was touched and had a rethink on what to do with his life. He accepted Jesus and soon volunteered to work alongside Paul in the ministry. Working in the field for Christ and yet reminiscing about the power and opportunities he could have been enjoying had he joined the army and risen through the ranks was his undoing. The pride, the power, the women, the booze and the seeming lush life. Then one afternoon, when Paul and his team didn’t have enough food to eat and being beaten by the sun on their way to Jerusalem, Demas saw an old friend who had become a high-rank soldier. He looked down on himself and considered himself a failure. His friend was headed for Thessalonica and offered an opportunity. Demas dumped the parchments and abandoned the work of the ministry and headed for Thessalonica. Maybe he didn’t renounce Jesus, but he now had a different priority.
Demas was here!
The devil has a lot of tricks to sweep believers off their feet. His tricks are subtle because what he uses does not necessarily have to be a bad thing. The phrase, “things of this world” does not necessarily refer to sinful indulgences. It encompasses an obsession about the needful things of life and also an indulgence in the world’s sinful ways. We know that pornography, drugs, sexual immorality, fraud, corruption, drunkenness, etc are outright world’s sinful ways of living, but there are other negative habits like addictions to games, sports and social media, undue attention to academic and professional pursuit, consumption of wrong Christian materials, teachings and doctrines, unhealthy spiritual information, or even an extreme attitude of focusing too much on the right things but allowing other vital aspects of one’s life to suffer.
Paying too much attention to worldly affairs that are not sinful in themselves can be tricky. They sap you of your energy to stay consistent in pursuit of goals that are of greater relevance both to the kingdom of God and your ultimate purpose in life. Sometimes you may need to take a break and evaluate your priorities and see whether they have become skewed towards earthly pursuits at the expense of your greater calling. Ask yourself how each activity you find yourself doing contribute to your purpose.
To be continued next week.
-Tope S. Aladenusi
The Power of Habit
A certain man had the habit of carrying around a bag containing 30 small pebbles. He dropped a pebble into a body of water each day he crossed a particular bridge. He would exhaust a bag of 30 pebbles in one month. This practice was his token for reminding him of his need to stay consistent with his goals in life. One day, he crossed the bridge with a group of friends and didn’t want to embarrass them with his common practice and decided not to throw a pebble into the water that moment. At the juncture on the other end of the bridge, his companions dispersed, except for his best friend who lived on the same street with him. He headed back on the bridge. When he told his friend his reason for going back, the friend mocked, “That’s a stupid thing to do. But if you insist, why not go home and sleep. Tomorrow, you can throw in two pebbles.” The man replied, “If I start doing that, one day I might be tempted to throw in seven for a week or the whole bag for a month or I would jump inside the water to serve forever.”
First we form our habits and later our habits form us. Then we can say we have achieved autopilot status. You want to get to that point where you start doing the right thing without thinking about it or with less effort. For instance, if you have been a believer for at least 6 months, I would expect the following should have been in auto-mode in your life: praise and worship; prayer; meditating on the Word; witnessing about Christ and giving.
Psychologists say it takes about six weeks for a habit to develop. It takes about three weeks to get familiar with a new task or new behaviour. It takes another three weeks before it becomes a solid habit in your life. Most people have never been successful in being consistent in their daily time with God because they’ve never made it past the six-week barrier without missing a day. Praying 30 minutes daily for 90 days can form a habit that can transform your life forever, for instance.
The best computer systems are all on auto-mode. Your bank is always available for transaction because they have systems that have been configured to be consistent. Imagine how cumbersome the process would be if someone has to personally send you your balance each time you use the ATM. When you develop the right habits, your life tends to be somewhat a type of such an organised system. By default, you are more attuned to doing the right things.
To be continued next week.
-Tope S. Aladenusi
Setting The Right Goals
“I press on toward the goal unto the prize of the high calling of God ...” Philippians 3:14 (ASV).
The thing with most powerful success principles is that they often sound too simple to be the key. Set the right goals and get passionate about them.
Wait a minute. God didn’t just throw people down here because He has a vision that reads, “To fill the earth with 10 billion people by 2020.” No! He created every one of us uniquely to find purpose in Him and to be fulfilled. That means that we have to find that purpose and run with it. Conversely, running with the wrong purpose is impetuous.
What goals are you chasing? Have you set goals that are contrary to your position in Christ?Do you pursue goals just so that you relish the euphoria of your accomplishments?You hear people say, “I want to be the richest in my family,” or “I want to be the most popular minister in town,” or “I want to make it in this life before 30.” Again, do not run your life as though you were in a competition with others. Stop rushing into things because everybody is doing so. Don’t attempt to force yourself into limelight.
That’s the reason it is important that after giving your life to Christ, you deliberately get on the journey of discovery—that of the plans God has for your life through study of the Word and fellowship with Him in prayers. Document what God lays in your heart, and as you go ahead, you will begin to see ahead, without necessarily seeing the complete picture.
Now, a goal should not just be in one’s head. It should be written down in black and white, otherwise it is merely a wish. The difference between a wish and a goal is a plan. A goal is followed up with a plan of action with specific deadlines. Goals that have no deadlines are easily eroded by procrastination and the passion to realise the goals become waned with the passing of time. Whether your disposition is to move towards success (to gain something) or to walk away from failure (to avoid pain), develop a winning habit of acting out your goals and plans within the confines of the set deadlines.
To be continued next week.
-Tope S. Aladenusi
Consistency: What’s The Big Deal?
It took more than six thousand years for the world’s population to reach 7.5 billion people from the starting point of a mere couple. Even though deaths throughout history have made major deductions, yet one child birth after another has led to exponential population explosion across the globe. The first man and woman could have been bewildered about how and when the herculean task of filling up the earth would be achieved, but they went on to bringing forth the first child, anyway, and the next and so on. It was a matter of consistency over time before we would have peoples everywhere on the face of the earth.
The above illustration holds the key to what we make of our life from start to finish. One of the biggest culprits for people not doing what they set out to do is inconsistency. Have you ever wondered why people start out with great intentions, but fail to sustain it? Are you bothered about the difference between how your life is and how it should be? Why do couples start out with so much love and continue with so much fight? Why do graduates of the same set have different impacts 10 years later on?If you trace down to first cause, you will likely find the lack of consistency at the back of every underachievement. Consistency involves setting your sight on your goals and holding them there until they are realised. Understanding and developing consistency is one of the most important things you can do to improve the successfulness you experience in your life in general. In life, people who don’t execute their plans are no different fromthose without plans at all.
Rid your mind of misconceptions that get some believers trapped in the vicious circle of underperformance. To start with, realising purpose does not have to happen very fast just because you are a child of God. You have torecognise the place of process in progress. Also, as a new creature in Christ, you now belong with a new family and cannot come under a spiritual curse to make you a failure in life. What holds true in your biological lineage has nothing on you anymore. No one can hinder you, but yourself. Lastly, on the path of consistency, your aim is not to become a perfectionist, and having to deal with challenges or obstacles may not necessarily be a pointer that you are outside God’s will.
A lot people quit after a few attempts or they lose the courage they first had when they set goals. The success you see out there is the product of somebody’s consistency. As you persist in the direction of the goals you have set for yourself and consistently do the required bits, you will find that the universe will bring the right information, people, ideas and opportunities your way to help fulfill the goals you have set.
In the subsequent write-ups in this topic, we will address “how to maintain consistency in the pursuit of life’s goals”.
To be continued next week.
Tope S. Aladenusi
Managing diversities in the home
If you ask a single lady what kind of man she wants in her life, you would know in an instant that she’s in some kind of dream land if her checklist looks something like this: “Very Tall. Dark. Handsome. Six packs. Rich. Lives in Banana Island. Drives a Porsche. Very caring. Does not complain. Very Tolerant. Virgin. Amen.” Where do you hope to find a guy like that? Such guys are even scarce in the Bible. Most people know this list is funny and unrealistic. But it is surprising that we are almost like that when it comes to our expectations from our spouses in many regards. We have this self-made idea of what our ideal spouse should be like and we try to work it inside them. If we ever achieve anything from this expectation, it is that we have succeeded in chasing away peace from the home.
One very bedrock your family needs in order to fulfill purpose is peace in the home. For in the long run, you will not amount to much if there is always trouble in the home. Peace is very important and that’s why the devil is trying to take it away, because he knows that the lack of peace makes you vulnerable. Proverbs 21:9 says, “Better to live on the roof than share the house with a nagging wife.” You may say that’s not too fair for women. Now for men: “Better to live in prison than share the house with an insensitive husband.”
A major cause of issues in a marriage is the clash of personal preferences. Each marriage partner has his or her idiosyncrasies which may have been formed by different background, culture, exposure, fantasies etc. and these give varying worldviews. We are wired differently and are now united in the bond of marriage. The worst is, the world is trying to define to us what love is or how love should be expressed. A peck in the morning. Joint account. Lunch box for your husband. Rush to the car to welcome him from work. Dinner out every other week end. And so on. So where these things are not done, love may be waning. No! As nice as these activities appear, they are really our personal preferences, not scriptural references.
Many of us get into marriage with a long list of “nice things to have,” and they are only found in the mind, most times, not in reality. If you find things you want adjusted in your spouse, communicate to them and give them several years to adjust, because, after all, they probably have been like that for many years. We can be diverse in terms of our background and personal traits, but we can stand united. Remember, the husband and the wife is one. Let everybody be who God has wired them to be. Let peace and unity reign. So, as a rule of thumb, whenever you face any clash of opinion in your marriage, take time out to ask yourself: “is this my personal preference or is there is a scriptural reference to this situation?” You will find yourself beginning to calm down and it then becomes easier to become flexible about things. Your spouse is not your competition. Win-win!
– Tope S. Aladenusi
The Best Legacy For Your Children
You have heard many people say that the best legacy to give your children is education. That is wrong and not biblical. The best gift you can ever give to your children is Christ. That is the best legacy you can leave your kids with. To give them Christ, they need your attention. With the right values, your children will fulfill their purpose in life.
We should stop raising devilish technocrats in our homes. When kids are young, say before teenage age, they crave our attention, and if we don’t give it to them, we will be the ones craving theirs when they become teenagers or older. When you come back from work and the kids want to play with you and tell you stories of all the events that happened during the day, that’s an opportunity to shape their mindsets and habits. Grab it! But that’s when we are tired from the day’s work. We shut them down and play some cartoons for them. They are going to learn what is right and wrong from the TV and Internet if we are not there to train them.
You are the first role model to your kids. They learn from how you live your life. People learn about things by hearing about them, but they learn how to do things by watching people do them. Model Christ in front of your kids daily because they pick more from your actions than your words. It is the habits they pick up from you today that will govern their lives tomorrow. It appears our lifestyle today is tailored to only making a living. The devil has lied to many that as long as you give education, that’s okay. The devil is the god of this world and can easily penetrate the educational system. In fact, in some lands, he has successfully removed the “church” from schools. There is something more important than education. Teach your kids the Word, and they will excel anywhere they find themselves.
Watch the growth and progress of your children. Ask them questions about their views on Bible truths or how they would face different types of challenges or situations, and use that as an opportunity to teach them what you have learned from the Word. You can use role-playing also. This activity will help you decipher their motivation and help you mould them.
I like the Chinese proverb that says – “the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” It doesn’t matter how long you have been missing the point, start giving your children the best legacy today!
– Tope S. Aladenusi
Managing Your Own Government
God willing, you may become a president of your country or the CEO of a thriving company or have a ministry with a global impact, and that comes with a lot of responsibilities. The expectations are enormous. Obviously, not everybody reading this will venture into politics or try their hands at a start-up or be led into full-time ministry. But just in case you think you have a better idea on how to run your country or manage the company you work for or transform the ministry God has placed you in and wished you were in charge of things, look no further. If you have a family, you already have where to start from. You already have your own government.
The family is the smallest unit of society, and the Christian family is a microcosm of the church. It deserves no less attention and management than any other sphere of influence that God has called you into. Paul asked a rhetoric question in 1 Timothy 3:5: “If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?” It’s striking that he uses the word, “manage,” because the family needs to be managed much like any other organisation—the church, a company, or a country.
The family is the zone where all the elements of man (that is, the spirit, soul and body) get sufficient attention. Make provision for the spirit and soul of every member of the family, without neglecting the body of everyone. Take care of yourself and your spouse. You are both emotional beings. You cannot get too spiritual to the extent that you do not pay attention to your spouse’s physical and emotional needs. Satisfy each other. Pay attention to your children, especially before their teenage stage. Make the effort to instill godly characters in them while they are still very young. Eat together as a family. Have close family fellowships where you can break bread together. In such gatherings, everyone can discuss a topic, and grow together.
To be continued next week.
– Tope S. Aladenusi
Love and Submission in the Family – Not A Transaction
Unless you went for window shopping, whenever you walked into a shopping mall, you definitely had things to buy. As you walked along the aisle, putting things into your cart, you were well aware you had cash in your wallet or purse, or you had your credit or debit card with you. The cashier handled your payment and issued you a receipt. Now everybody was happy. They had your money, and you had their goods. Transaction completed.
The above scenario is a familiar one, and somehow, we have come to see life mostly as a transaction—“give and take” or “take and give” and that attitude has been brought into marriages since two parties are also involved. The Apostle Paul gave a set of instructions for Christian households regarding relationships in Ephesians 5:21-33. Two phrases that readily come to mind are: “Wives, submit to your husbands…” and “Husbands, love your wives…” Many people have misconstrued these two injunctions to be a deed of partnership and have reduced marital relationship to a mere transaction.
So you hear men say, “I cannot continue loving this woman if she doesn’t submit to me,” and women, “I will submit to my husband if and only if he proves to be loving.” This is not marriage; at best, it is a transaction -“Pay Before Service!” Where marriage is seen this way, the problem becomes that of who gives first, and this further complicates things. Paul started his discourse on marriage by saying in verse 21, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” and the Bible also commands us almost everywhere to love one another. You see? The Husband is the Chief Loving Officer (CLO) and the wife, the Chief Submission Officer (CSO) in terms of overall responsibility, but each one has “love” and “submission” in their job descriptions because they are first Christians before they are couples. For example, Titus 2:4 says, “…Teach the young women…to love their husbands…”
The principle of love and submission is to be done by both husbands and wives. They should both be loving and submitting. I cannot stress the importance of loving each other enough. There are also times when a wife can have a superior idea or make inputs in grey areas that the husband didn’t take note of from the outset.
Love each other. One of the most striking things about God’s kind of love is that you can teach yourself to operate in it. Carnal love is completely motivated by the emotions or senses, but God’s kind of love comes from the heart, and although feelings are definitely affected, they don’t motivate or deter God’s kind of love. God’s kind of love is a choice you make on the basis of what God said, and then act on it in faith until it becomes a reality in your spirit, soul and body.
Make a commitment today to always be proactive in putting love and submission on the table in your family, and you will experience a home after God’s heart.
To be continued next week.
– Tope S. Aladenusi
Lesson from the Marriage Triangle
Imagine you and your spouse were each standing on the two ends of the base of a triangle, and you started climbing up to the tip of the triangle from your different points. As you climb higher to the tip of the triangle, you would find that something else is happening—you are unwittingly getting closer to each other to the point where you can both reach out to touch each other. What you noticed would be that the higher you climb up the triangle, the distance between each of you decreases.
The tip of that triangle is Christ! And the two of you are at a certain distance apart from each other right now. What is the proximity between the two of you today? When the two of you are each aiming for the tip of the triangle—Christ—your marriage can only get better because you are becoming a better Christian; you are each becoming more and more like Christ. Hallelujah! Two “Christs” under one roof!
Someone taught me the story of the marriage triangle while I was a teenager and it has really been an inspiration to me. I once told my wife before we got married that we ought not to quarrel as a family. The idea first came when I asked myself what kind of union we would have if two “Christs” were living together. The mutual and unconditional love, the high level of tolerance, the understanding, the cooperation, the singleness of mind and purpose, and every good thing. The fruit of the Spirit – Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness, self-control would be in surplus.
Here’s the thing: You are first of all a Christian before you are somebody’s wife or husband. In fact, in heaven where you are going, you don’t have a marital status. Many of us are praying for and desiring the fruit of the Spirit in our home, but our roots are being sapped by the world. Many are neglecting quality Bible study, prayer, attending good fellowship and living the Word and are struggling to display the Christian virtues they see in others. We are running after the quick fixes psychologists and marriage counselors offer on the Internet, but things don’t seem to work because our roots are not receiving nutrition from the right place. Trees don’t struggle to get fruits on themselves; they just get their roots to the ground for proper nourishment. It is fellowship with Christ that ensures we get our nourishment from the Spirit. No wonder He says, “Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:4-5)”
The most potent way to transform any family is for the couples to daily become like Christ. Start aiming for that today, and in a short time your progress will be very visible.
To be continued next week.
– Tope S. Aladenusi
STUDY THIRTEEN:
There is no other religion that is built on the person and works of its founder except Christianity.
Without Christ, Christianity will be void because He is the core, the essence, the pillar and the heart.
He was the origin and will be the fulfillment of its hopes.
PROPHECIES CONCERNING THE BIRTH OF CHRIST
Jesus Christ did not come to earth unannounced; He came in the ―fullness of time. Galatians 4:4. All the prophecies concerning Him were fulfilled exactly as prophesied:
- Christ would come out of Judah. Genesis 49:10, Luke 1:31-33.
- Christ would be born in Bethlehem. Micah 5:2, Luke 2:4-7.
- He would be born by a virgin. Isaiah 7:14, Matthew 1:18, 22-23.
- John the Baptist would be His forerunner. Isaiah 40:3, Matthew 3:3.
THE VIRGIN BIRTH OF CHRIST
In accordance with the promise of God, in Isaiah 7:14, Christ was born by the Virgin Mary. This miraculous conception was necessary because God required a sinless blood to cleanse the sin of mankind. By this birth, Christ did not inherit the sin nature and so, He was able to atone for the sin of mankind. The mystery of the virgin birth is to believed and accepted.
THE PURPOSE OF THE VIRGIN BIRTH
- To reveal God to mankind. John 1:18
- To bridge the gap between man and God. I Timothy 2:5
- To save men. Hebrews 2:14-16
- To rescue the whole creation. Romans 8:19-22
THE DEITY OF CHRIST
No one who accepts the Bible as the infallible word of God will doubt the deity of Christ. Jesus claimed the Deity Himself in John 10:30 and this was the main reason He was crucified. John 19:7.
Scriptural Proofs of the Deity of Christ
- God has come to live with us. Matthew 1:23, Isaiah 7:14
- Christ is identified by divine names. Isaiah 9:6-7, John 10:30
- The personal name JEHOVAH (I AM) belongs to both God and Christ. Exodus 3:14, John 10:5-8.
- Jesus forgave sins. Mark 2:5, 7.
- He claimed equality with the Father. Matthew 28: 18-19, II Corinthians 13:14.
- He claimed omnipresence. Matthew 18:20, Omnipotence Luke 8:24 and Omniscience Mark 11:2-6.
- The fact of His resurrection. Romans 1:4; 6:4.
THE HUMANITY OF CHRIST
In order to be the Saviour, Jesus had to not only be divine but also a true man. He was like us in every respect except sinful nature. If He were not fully human, He could not have represented us on the cross and He could not be the High Priest who comforts and strengthens us. Hebrews 2:16-18.
Scriptural Proofs of His Humanity
- Jesus had human ancestry Luke 2:7, I John 4:3.
- He was subject to the law of human development Luke 2:40.
- He was subject to human instinct such as:
i. Hunger. Matthew 4:2, 21:18;
ii. Weeping. John 11:35;
iii. Sleeping. Matthew 8:24;
iv. Prayer. Matthew 14:23;
v. Anger. Mark.3:5;
vi. Death Hebrews 9:27-28.
Gabriel Ajibade